“What did you do with him?”

“Jeremy, what are you doing in my—”

“What did you do with him?” he shouted at me. “I saw you by the lake! I saw you swimming in your underwear! I saw him kiss you when you were lying on your back! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH HIM?”

“Jeremy,” I said, trying to be calm, “you had no right to spy on us. And you have no right to ask me these questions.”

He looked at me as if this was the most idiotic thing he had ever heard. “I’m your brother!” he blurted. “I have a right to look out for you!”

“You’re not looking out for me, Jeremy, you’re spying on me. And you said it, you are my brother, and that’s all. That doesn’t give you the right to demand private information about what I do with Damon.”

I’m afraid of what I did to Jeremy when I said that, because he looked as if something inside of him had broken with those words. For now, I wanted to add, until I figure this thing out. But I dared not say it out loud. I was still too afraid.

“Fine,” he muttered, and rose from the bed. He came across the room without looking at me, and then paused when he reached my side. “Let me kiss you goodnight,” he said. There was a weird look in his eyes that I’d never seen before.

“Okay,” I said tentatively, and turned to him. He leaned in to me slowly, and I felt my heart flutter in spite of itself as his face got closer to mine. But he kissed me full on the mouth, gently, a lover’s kiss, not a brother’s, and I felt my heart turn to stone. He kept going, trying to open my lips to kiss me more passionately. I nearly lost my determination to think carefully about him before allowing anything further to happen between us, because his kiss sent thrills all over my body. But I was more than a little shocked by his boldness, and I broke the kiss and turned away. “Goodnight,” I said, forcing my voice to be steady.

“It’s not fair, Jessamyn,” said Jeremy softly behind my back, “that he gets to kiss you like that and I don’t, just because I’m your brother. I care for you more than he ever could.”

He closed the door behind him. As soon as he was gone, I ran over to my bed and buried my head in the pillow. I felt dizzy with all the emotion. I still felt a trace of joy from the wonderful day I’d had with Damon. I was sad and angry and very disturbed about how Jeremy had just acted. I’d never seen such an angry, spiteful, demanding side of him before. And mostly I felt despair about my own conflicting and confusing feelings about my brother and what he’d confessed to me. I wanted so much to make a decision and be done with it, but I felt sure that it would be a long time before I had settled on the answer.

For the moment, there was nothing I could do but cry, and I did; literally cried myself to sleep for the first time since we’d come to the Delahaye. When I woke up the next morning, I felt minimally better. It was a new day, and hopefully I’d see Damon, and Jeremy surely would not be today the strange alien that I’d met the night before.